I'm quite surprised by the results of my poll actually. So only one person here is 'one of my mates' without having their own diary. I thought there would have been more.

I'm also quite interested in the people who say that they don't THINK I read their diary.....this means they have one, they read mine, they may feel that they know me, but I don't reciprocate! Does that make me rude???

And 15 people who KNOW that I don't read their diaries? Woah! Wonder if they're interesting. Way more interesting than me. but then my life is SO dead exciting (as Barry deigned to comment yesterday - cheers 'mate'!!!)

Yesterday, cos I was annoyed with The Northerner, i was reading all my old written diaries from like 1997-98 and it got me thinking about a lot of things. And you know what it's like when something plays on your mind..........I just could NOT get C out of my head. For the rest of the evening i kept thinking about him, and the fact that I just well, miss his face sometimes. (By the way, if you don't know who C is, you can check out my cast of characters).

Anyway, so I ended up ringing him while I was in the bath. The last time I rang him was about 2 months ago when i was dead pissed, and I can't really remember much of what we spoke about! He always seems genuinely pleased to hear from me - even though the stupid tosser will hardly ever ring me himself!

It was his birthday last month and he seems to have taken that as a point to chantge his life and get it back on track. It's almost like he's grown up! He hasn't puffed for 6 weeks now - and I mean he was like a 5 joints a night kinda guy. He's started running again and he has also given up the FIVE WOMEN he was shagging, cos he thinks it's about time he thought what he wanted long term.

When we got to talking about all that, he was quite sentimental about things. He said I was the best cook by far that he'd ever gone out with - which is flattering, LOL, and then he said "They just don't get me Son........how come noone seems to get me and yet you read me like an open book? You always have!"

I said to him "That's cos they keep looking for your hidden depths, they think there must be more behind what you do or say.....whereas I have long since accepted that this IS you. You're just as you are!" He then accused me of saying he was shallow - ha ha!! It's not true though. I only expected C to be C, nothing more nothing less......and he never let me down on that part. Plus (and this is quite scary) I have now known him for 15 years. I know his history. I know what's affected him. I know his likely course of action in certain circumstances.

Sometimes I miss that.