I am SO not enjoying myself at the moment. There have been the occasional nice shiny times, but there's been nothing sparkly for a while now! I feel very very very deflated!

Ok - let me summarise. Firstly - the crap:

* Spoke to C on Sunday, he said he would give me a ring later about seeing me that evening. Still haven't heard from him

* Haven't heard from The Hat at all since Friday - which is actually very very odd

* Have had countless arguments with Mark about childcare etc which we tried to resolve Sunday morning but is obviously going to take a while

* Haven't heard from The Dutchman

* STILL have some Xmas presents to buy

* STILL in conflabs with my family about my movements over Xmas

* The munchkin has told me 6 times now that she 'Doesn't like Sharon'

* Put on weight cos I've been eating more cos I am SO unhappy

* Nothing to do tonight

Ok, now lets think of some shiny events over the past few days:

* Saw the lovely Lorna yesterday, even if it was a fleeting visit

* Had a REAL card through the post from K and a quite touching email from him when I thanked him for it

* Had a nice couple of hours with my next door neighbour and his friend last night - but it's a shame he'll be away til New Year

* Had a result and ended up getting a bargain for Abbi's present, just cos the shop assistants were inefficient - LOL

* My parents are fab

* My favourite gay still rings me two or three times a day

* I love the munchkin SO much.....the downside of this is that sometimes I look at her and get such a big rush of love that Mark is included in it cos she is part him. I don't really like that feeling, it makes me uncomfortable

* Had some really good online chats last night

* I go to Amsterdam soon with Lorna - woohoo!!

And I have just realised that another reason for me feeling a bit down could be the fact that I haven't taken my tablets for quite a while. Hmmmmm.....I think I'll go and do that now!